


Do the drugs still get you high?

by brenforelsket



Series: Do the Drugs Still Get You High? [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Drug Addiction, F/M, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, M/M, Modern AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-01-30
Packaged: 2021-03-16 00:41:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29073492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brenforelsket/pseuds/brenforelsket
Summary: Modern au tumblr request prompt  "do the drugs still get you high?" & “Is being high all the time worth losing everything?"
Relationships: Eren Yeager & Reader, Eren Yeager/Reader
Series: Do the Drugs Still Get You High? [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2165325
Kudos: 25





	Do the drugs still get you high?

**Author's Note:**

> Modern au tumblr request prompt "do the drugs still get you high?" & “Is being high all the time worth losing everything?"

As a fun and relaxing night with friends dies down and the bar slowly starts to lose patrons, you decide it’s best to take your leave too. It’s a cold winter night but you don’t mind the walk home; the alcohol in your system is warming and you're bundled up in your favorite red scarf. 

When you approach the steps of your house, you see a figure sitting on the steps and your heart sinks when you see the familiar long brown hair and bright green eyes.

“You changed the locks.” Eren comments when you come to stand in front of him.

“What are you doing here Eren?”

“I miss you.”

“I don’t care.” Your heart aches. No matter how you say you don’t, you care, you always have and you’ve longed to hear him say those words but you know it doesn’t make a difference in the end. He won't change.

“Can I come in?”

“Eren..” you know it’s a bad idea and you try to reason with yourself; letting your drug addicted boyfriend back into the house you once shared didn’t sound like it was something you’d be interested in but when you look at him now, sitting out in the cold, hopelessness written on his face, missing you and a part of you misses him. You give in, but only a little. “Fine. But you can’t stay for long. Okay?”

He doesn’t say anything but it’s impossible not to notice that he’s looking around and seeing that you’ve taken down every picture and memory of him. It’s almost like he doesn’t recognize his own house. 

He watches as you shed your winter coat and scarf. “I can’t believe you still have this.” he comes closer to you, too close for comfort, and runs his fingers over the red fabric. You try to gulp down the anxiety growing within you as his tall frame hovers over you and his eyes fixate on the scarf. “How long has it been since I gave this to you?”

You quickly grab it from his fingers and stuff it into your coat pocket. “It doesn’t matter Eren.”

He lets out a weak chuckle and backs away from you a bit. “I guess you’re right. It doesn’t. It looks good on you though.”

“Stop.” you demand, not wanting his sweet words. “Whatever it is you think you’re doing, stop.”

“Do you still love me?” 

The question rings through your ears for several seconds after the words leave his mouth. You hate him for asking. Of course you love him, you always have. But love could no longer fix what he’d broken. You both knew that. 

You can feel your body start to tremble as you make eye contact with him, his green eyes strained and fogged over but still intense. He looks at you like he’s actually expecting the words to come from your mouth but you can’t, you won't say it no matter how much it may be true. 

He grabs onto your arm and squeezes lightly, you’re sure it’s meant to be comforting but comfort is the last thing you feel when he’s like this. Where his fingers grab onto you burns your flesh, you used to love when he would touch you and hold you but he isn’t the man you once knew and now when he touches you, you hate it. 

You jerk your arm from his grip and back away from him. “Do the drugs still get you high Eren?” your voice is cold and sharp, it’s a tone you hate using but with Eren recently, you don’t have much choice and the alcohol only makes it colder.

“Not like you do.” he says it so quietly, like you weren’t meant to hear it but you do and you see the small smile that falls on his lips as he does.

It makes you sick to your stomach seeing his twisted humor take over. “I think you should go.” you start to walk towards the front door but he grabs onto your wrist. 

You turn around on your heels quickly, ready to smack his hand away but when you look into his green eyes, you see the tears pooling in them. It breaks your heart seeing him like this but you convince yourself you need to be strong. You slowly pull away. 

“I still want to see the ocean with you.” 

Your heartbeat stops suddenly and just as quickly, it begins to beat out of your chest. “We don’t share that dream anymore Eren.” you voice cracks as you speak, you don’t know how much longer you can put on a calm facade. “You decided drugs were more important than our dreams.”

“I didn’t.” 

“You did!” your building anxiety and anger snaps. “You’re high right now. I know you are. Is being high all the time worth losing everything?!”

He stands there staring at you, broken hearted and not sure what else to say.

“You’ve made it clear it’s worth losing everything. Crystal fucking clear.” you can’t stop the tears that flow down your face. “I tried so hard to help you, to get you on the right track but it always blows up in my face.” you spat. He comes closer to you but you shove your hands against his chest, not able to stand the closeness, pushing him closer to the door. “I can’t do this anymore. Get out Eren!”

“But if I lose you, what will I have?” his voice breaks and he grabs onto your hands. 

“I don’t know Eren but you’ve already lost me.” You gulp down the sob that is begging to be let out and pull your hands from his. “Please, just go.”

You can’t stand to look at him anymore, you quickly shut and lock the door, sliding your back against it and curling into your knees, heartbroken and sobbing, questioning when this would end.


End file.
